Breaking up with Harry Styles was “hard” for Olivia Wilde? OK – Get in line

This just in – taking a break from her relationship with genderqueer Skittles target Harry Styles has been “difficult” for Olivia Wilde.

Uh huh. Is that right? Was it “difficult” for you, Olivia Wilde? Because do you want to know how it was for us? It has COMPLETELY RUINED OUR LIVES!!!!!! OUR EVERY WAKE MOMENT!!!!!!!!!! WE HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO PREPARE FOR THANKSGIVING BECAUSE WE CAN’T STOP SCREAMING!!!!! FOR DAYS!!!!!!!!!! OUR FAMILIES ARE DISAPPOINTED!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wilde and Styles announced their Friends stage (“we were on break”) last Friday. It would have been nice if they had at least let us get through the holidays without destroying the apparent house of cards upon which we had built our will to live, but I think it’s always best to exist in your own truth. Today’s news comes from a source close to Wilde, who told People, “The break was hard for Olivia.” Oh – I bet. “They’ve had some issues, but Olivia thought they would sort it all out. She’s disappointed. It’s just a tricky situation though.”

Disappointed, huh? That’s funny. That’s actually hilarious, because you know, I’d kill to be disappointed. I would destroy everything I cared about, pull it limb of limbdance in its blood and eat it bones to feel the comfort and convenience of “disappointment” at the moment.

Hey Olivia Wilde, do you want to know how I feel about Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles, my favorite real life couple that I completely believed in from day one and loved every moment, taking a break? Do you want to know how I feel that I can no longer see pictures of Olivia Wilde dancing at a Harry Styles concert, or those two outside wearing a mask and a sweater? I feel crushed. I feel sick. Like a muddy rubber boot thrown on a bunch of dying embers: disgusting, smelly and melting (very slowly). I feel damn bad, man. I feel damn bad.

Source link

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *